Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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