i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
She needs sedatives and a leash
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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