sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
I am one with the molecules
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
