shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
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