FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
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