wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
We are all done wearing pants today
Randomize
