Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
