Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
Randomize
