Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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