Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
True but thats because hes a fetus.
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Randomize
