This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
