You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
