Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
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