White coat. Heels.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Fighting the police is like screwing a fat girl, if I'm drunk enough I'll do it
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Randomize
