She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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