white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Randomize
