can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize
