It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Holy shit dude........stairs
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