Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Randomize