TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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