You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
