thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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