Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
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