a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
