Don't make out with my wife yet
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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