dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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