I need help removing her.
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
