drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
