Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize
