what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
