The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
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