is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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