good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
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