SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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