I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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