When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Randomize
