Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
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