Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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