dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
i will never coherently bang her
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize
