i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
