He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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