If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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