Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
