that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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