we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
