At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Randomize
