when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
