I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
