Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Go christen that room with your naked body.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Randomize
