no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
